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Your Own Private, Personal Terrorist

Are you aware of having your Own, Private and actually very very Personal Terrorist?
Confused mind
Does it sound shocking to you? What kind of thoughts does it bring to you if you think that you are in possession of it and maybe you haven't even been aware of it? What more living with it for years and years and letting it do its job to the very best, with no proper defence on your part?

Now as cruel as it might sound, we all have it, and in the most of our lives, we are giving into its terrors  without having a say in our part. You can tell it to stop and it won't, and even makes the situation even more unpleasant for you. You can try to get rid of it, but it's just there, always finding a new way to intimidate you, and bringing all of the things which you likely would have stayed without..

Have you already guessed the name of the terrorist? If it is still confusing on your part, and surprising in a way that you almost want to deny it, then you definitely have not guessed this. I will have to reveal it's identity to you -

It is the Mind.

You might have a desire to say, now wait a minute, my mind is not terrorizing me at all! Fair enough, although this cannot be proven to be true. Have you ever felt ashamed, guilty, sad, mad, not good enough? I am sure you can relate to at least something similar. Now you might want to say but all of these are just normal emotions to feel sometimes! To a certain extent, this might be true. But Mind, sometimes insists you to feel something that is not actually there. It creates expectations, disappointments, and the like, and very often, you take it in yourself and believe it into reality to be 'true'. On the other hand, Mind has just finished and enjoyed its job well done.

Think of the many times when all kinds of thoughts kept coming to you which you wanted to get rid of. You just wanted not to have them, but the minute you think of that, ten more of them come with higher intensity. And the worst thing is, they don't stop. For example, before falling asleep, you come into a space where you do nothing and just lay down, allowing sleep to naturally occur. In that space, what does your mind do? Does it say okay, just rest right now, I will give you emptiness and peace? Or do you experience an out-pour of thoughts, which sometimes do not even make sense?

So it says to iself

Now, why is sleep loved so much? That is because in this state, you are able to get rid of your mind. It does not bother you any more unless you have such a strong identification with it, that you somehow manage to carry it into your dream states, which does not make your sleep as pleasantly as it could be in a very deep, restful, peaceful, calm sleep.
However, you are here to become aware of it, to become aware of the mind working against you, which creates feelings, ideas, beliefs which does not serve. 
You are here to make Mind your servant, and that I can tell you, is joy, when mind is not bothering you but serving you.

How do you do this?

First of all, the right understanding must take place. Ask yourself: am I my mind? The fact that you have it, and call it 'my mind', means that you are something else than the mind. So try and See, can you get to that who is the one who owns the mind? Ask yourself, Who am I, who is in possession of this mind? See where is it taking you.

The problem of most people is that they are identified as the Mind itself. But once you start seeing that you own this mind, you can also see that you don't have to believe in everything that the mind says. You can start by just observing it, without taking direct participation in it. But here I have to warn you, your mind will not like this, and will try even more intensely to get you back into itself, and soon you will be aware of its terrors occurring against you. But stay as an observer of it, do not let yourself be pulled in, and see what happens.

Let me know what happened, and how does it feel just to look at it, without identifying to be it. If there are any other questions or troubles you are having, I will be happy to help you out with that.

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